Staff Reports
In yet another episode of “Let’s Confuse the Audience,” Don Lemon has somehow managed to twist the definition of a crime into a concept as bendy as a pretzel. Viewers were treated to a front-row seat at the carnival of misunderstandings about what constitutes illegal activity. Apparently, crossing the border illegally, according to him, isn’t a crime. It’s just, well, a harmless misdemeanor. The audience couldn’t help but wonder if we were all caught in an episode of “Who’s the Law Anyway?” where the rules are made up and definitions don’t matter.
While attempting to juggle legal terms, Lemon confidently proclaimed that misdemeanors aren’t really crimes. It’s like saying speeding is just a gentle suggestion rather than a violation. Picture a police officer pulling someone over for speeding and saying, “Don’t worry, it’s only a misdemeanor. Carry on with your day!” Meanwhile, anyone who’s ever faced a fine or had to attend traffic school might beg to differ.
As the discussion continued, Lemon made it sound like there’s a fine line—or perhaps just a cloudy mist—between breaking rules and breaking laws. It seemed he wanted to assure everyone that entering a country illegally simply breaks some obscure rule, rather than it being a legitimate legal issue. In the world where Lemon’s logic reigns, perhaps rules are like guidelines, or maybe just friendly tips that one can follow if they feel like it.
Of course, this led to the mind-boggling suggestion that if it’s not a crime, people who crossed illegally shouldn’t face removal unless they’re true criminals. The logic is as clear as mud. After all, if everyone followed Lemon’s chain of reasoning, we’d be living in a world where you could steal cookies from a jar and call it an innovative way to lower sugar intake, rather than a simple case of theft.
It’s entertaining, really, how some folks can reach a high perch on the media ladder by painting with the brush of confusion. One might marvel at how Lemon spent so many years on prime time asserting what seems like an alternate universe interpretation of law. If this episode is any indication, the quest for clarity from his corner might remain as elusive as finding a unicorn in the wild. In the end, viewers might just come to the conclusion that engaging with basic logic might be as necessary as it is underrated.
