Staff Reports
FBI Director Christopher Wray has once again managed to leave conservatives shaking their heads more vigorously than a bobblehead on a bumpy road. In a recent congressional hearing, Wray failed to definitively state whether recently threatened former President Donald Trump was hit by a bullet or merely grazed by a piece of shrapnel. It’s not exactly rocket science, but apparently, the FBI needs a few more field trips to figure it out.
Under questioning from Rep. Kevin Kiley, Wray admitted he wasn’t quite sure what caused the injury to Trump’s ear during an assassination attempt at a rally in Butler, Pennsylvania. It seems that while Democrats are obsessing over the definition of “is,” the FBI can’t seem to settle on a simple assertion about a gunshot wound. The agency, whose motto is supposedly “Fidelity, Bravery, Integrity,” appears to be floundering in the face of fundamental facts, leaving Americans to wonder just how effective they are at solving actual crimes.
Great. The FBI Is Run by a Conspiracy Theorist https://t.co/3FOXZOHPfd
— Flopping Aces (@FloppingAces) July 25, 2024
When committee chair Rep. Jim Jordan asked Wray about the whereabouts of the eight bullets fired during the incident, the FBI director responded with all the confidence of a contestant on a game show who forgot to study. Wray’s nonsensical comments only reinforced the impression that the FBI is operating like a committee of college students cramming for a finals exam the night before. The ongoing confusion about whether a bullet or shrapnel caused the injury is raising eyebrows, especially among those who follow the news and expect a semblance of competence from a government agency.
Meanwhile, Trump—who has a nose for hyperbole—stated shortly after the incident that a bullet had come perilously close to taking his life. His description of feeling a “whizzing sound” next to his ear evokes a scene straight out of a suspense thriller. Trump’s former White House doctor, Rep. Ronny Jackson, confirmed he examined Trump’s ear and claimed the injury was a bullet graze. It’s always convenient when a shooter’s medical professional can back up the former president’s account.
Adding fuel to the fire, left-leaning outlets initially went haywire with conspiratorial claims that Trump’s ear injury was not from a bullet but from broken glass. However, as it turns out, even the notoriously biased Snopes couldn’t corroborate those claims, debunking the rumors with the finesse of a Swiss watchmaker. The director of the FBI, meanwhile, seems a step behind the internet’s most infamous fact-checkers. One must consider: Is the FBI’s inability to determine the nature of the injury a mere oversight or evidence of a deeper issue within the agency?
The American public deserves a straightforward answer instead of bureaucratic doublespeak. As the FBI fumbling around for clarity, one has to wonder if it’s become a haven for anti-Trump theorists instead of a bastion of law and order. Because if a former president can’t receive a straightforward investigation into a life-threatening situation, what hope is there for the average citizen? The ever-growing scepticism surrounding the FBI’s efficiency has officially hit a new high, and the office seems to be waiting for a new flowchart or, possibly, a good old-fashioned game of charades to clear things up.
