in

Biden Abandons Apple for Donor Pal’s Christmas Stocking Stuffer!

Rejoice, folks! It’s the season of giving, and President Joe Biden has generously decided to gift his “close friend” Joe Kiani, the CEO of Masimo, a multi-million dollar present by not intervening to stop the ban on the latest models of the Apple Watch and Apple Watch Ultra. It’s the holiday miracle no one saw coming!

The U.S. International Trade Commission (USITC) banned the importation of these popular Apple wearables due to an alleged patent infringement by Masimo for the devices’ blood oxygen readings. Despite having the power to block the ban, President Biden just couldn’t bring himself to do it, letting the prohibition take effect before Christmas. Merry Christmas, Mr. Kiani!

But here’s the icing on the fruitcake: Joe Kiani, the CEO of Masimo, is not just any ordinary Joe. He’s a “close friend” of President Biden and has been known to be quite generous, donating a cool $1 million to the Biden Foundation. The New York Post even reported that Kiani and his wife were rubbing shoulders with the Bidens at a state dinner for France’s President Macron and even hosted first son Hunter Biden and his wife at their incredible, 8,000-acre Kiani Preserve. It sure sounds like a jolly good time over at the Kianis!

And the ties between the Bidens and the Kianis run deeper than Santa’s toy sack. There’s the little job offer for “troubled Biden niece Caroline Biden” at Masimo, a powerful appointment for Kiani to the President’s Council of Advisors on Science and Technology, and even a job for Kiani’s daughter Catherine working in the White House. It’s like a festive family reunion! Oh, and we can’t forget the incredible $750,000 donation to the pro-Biden Unite the Country PAC and nearly $3 million bundled to the president’s campaign. Now that’s the kind of giving that warms the heart during the holiday season!

Of course, Masimo claims it’s not about the money – it’s about holding Apple accountable for infringing on their patents and restoring integrity to the marketplace. Right, and the North Pole is just a chilly tropical paradise.

 

Written by Staff Reports

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *

Gen Z Ditches Beer for Spirits: US Brews Hit Historic Low!

McCain Fires Back: Slams Libel, Defies Hunter Biden Comparison