Biden Admin in Spin Mode After Disastrous Debate Performance

The circus known as the Biden administration continues to dazzle, now providing the latest act in their ever-dizzying spin on the President’s disastrous debate performance. The White House has somersaulted through so many explanations for why Biden could barely string a sentence together, one might think they were auditioning for a role in Cirque du Soleil. The newest twist: Biden saw his doctor after the debate. A convenient medical scapegoat for his less-than-stellar night under the lights.

Initially, the team in the White House press room put the blame on a cold the President allegedly caught during his jet-setting trips to Europe. However, the plot thickened when Andrew Bates, one of Biden’s beleaguered spokesmen, announced that Biden, age 81, had indeed checked in with his physician post-debate, contradicting earlier reports. This is the same White House that, just hours before, denied that Biden had seen any doctor. Oops, Biden’s gone to the doctor and nobody told Ms. Jean-Pierre.

Not to be outdone, Ms. Jean-Pierre, who has the hardest job in Washington trying to make sense of the nonsensical, quickly assured reporters that the President’s doctor visit was just a “brief check,” a far cry from a full-on physical. It’s quite the semantic circus, with everyone walking a tightrope trying to explain whether Joe Biden actually saw any doctor at all. When pressed on why Biden hadn’t had a proper checkup since February, she responded with a verbal twirl, noting that February was indeed in this calendar year.

On top of that, Biden reportedly reassured over 20 Democratic governors in a private tête-à-tête that he had seen a doctor and was, surprise-surprise, just fine. This latest development arrives as the White House pulls rabbits out of hats to excuse his shaky debate showing against the indomitable former President Donald Trump. Biden’s voice was raspy, his gaze was as vacant as a ghost town, leaving even the staunchest Democrat wondering if the President had accidentally shown up to the debate after hitting the snooze button one too many times.

Adding to the comedy, Biden attended a post-debate party and visited an Atlanta Waffle House, snapping photos and shaking hands as though he was in top form. Hardly the moves of a man supposedly undone by a cold. And just when the blame game couldn’t get more tangled, Biden himself later confessed to supporters that “jet lag” was actually at fault. What’s the next excuse—his teleprompter was haunted?

Jean-Pierre expertly tried to merge the cold and jet lag into a single, cohesive excuse, but let’s be honest, it’s harder to buy than beachfront property in Arizona. In a final plot twist, Biden admitted in an interview that he simply “screwed up,” as though American voters needed a reminder. The tragicomedy of Biden’s presidency continues to unfold, leaving Americans to decide if they want an excuse-laden performer or a president who actually shows up ready to lead.

Written by Staff Reports

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