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Trump Narrowly Leads in Wisconsin; Haley Crushes Biden!

In a twist that could shock even the strongest of tea-party sippers, the highly esteemed and widely respected Marquette University Law School poll has recently revealed that in the critical battleground state of Wisconsin, President Donald J. Trump is neck and neck with his Democratic opponent, Joe Biden. Yes, you heard that right! It’s a nail-biter, folks, with Trump and Biden locked in an epic tie among registered voters, and Trump narrowly edging out Biden by a leapfrogging single point among likely voters.

If those numbers don’t ruffle your conservative feathers, let’s add a dash of spice to the mix. When pitted against the resolute and formidable former President Trump, Joe Biden faces a drubbing at the hands of Republican candidate Nikki Haley. That’s right, folks! The numbers tell a tale of a whopping 57% backing the resilient and conservative Haley, while only 41% stand with the bumbling and stumbling Biden among registered voters. And if we thought that was a bloodbath, the likely voters’ stats show a colossal 57% support for Haley compared to a dismal 42% for Biden. Ouch!

But the real clincher of the poll comes from the fact that a staggering 75% of Wisconsin voters believe that the bumbling Biden has been up to no good with his son’s shady dealings, and the shadiness doesn’t stop there! A whopping 53% of voters even believe President Trump did something illegal following the 2020 election. Talk about a swampy situation! And in case you were wondering, the majority of Wisconsinites believe that Biden and Trump might both be a little long in the tooth for the top job, with a whopping 61% believing that Biden is “too old to be president.”

In a final flourish of political pugilism, newly-empowered Democrats in Wisconsin are clamoring for a radical revamp of district maps ahead of the upcoming election, a move that has the potential to reshape the political landscape in the Badger State. Hold onto your conservative cowboy hats, folks! It’s going to be a wild ride to the November elections!

Written by Staff Reports

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